My Audioblog coming up

Just a moment ....

Tied to shackles of the social expectations, I regret those moments of my life when I was not a rebel enough to live my life my way. I am proud of myself, whenever I took control of my life and did not heed to the voices of the outside world.

In search of the same self , who was not selfish but a confident crusader. I have learnt to live my life 

in a way where I do not depend on others for my happiness. I do not seek my happiness in what others think of me. That is their opinion, their perspective. I am not here to please the people around me. I want to live every moment as if this moment is the last moment of life. 

Been there, done that. Forget and move on. Yesterday, I went for a trip , it was a moment that 

was for that point of time. It is of no significance to my being today, except that i remember it as just one moment in the life. Tomorrow, I will be doing something that I have never done before. Not a big accomplishment , just been there , done that sort of moment, I will move on. 

Planning for a trip to hill station next . If I wait for the certain company,

my trip may never materialize, and I do not want to lose the moment of life,because motto in life is

"Live life without regrets" . Even though one of the biggest regrets I will always carry, and thanks to the outside societal pressure and people who don't really care enough, who took control of my life at that particular moment of my life when I could not fight. 

But still-- live life without regrets, because you never know when it will be the last moment of life.

Marriage Vows

Sia and Mohit have been married for two years now. They both live in an apartment in Mumbai Suburbs. Theirs had been an arranged marriage, just like the majority of weddings happen in India.
A few months of acquaintance and a formal conversation, eventually ended with both of them getting tied by the sacred knot known as marriage.
After the first few months of the nuptial period, life had been the mundane struggle for both of them to make the ends meet.
Sia has always been a carefree, "live your life to the hilt" kind of girl. She has aspirations for her career as well as her love life. Mohit on the contrary is a laid back, self indulgent and again carefree enough to care about the future. Sia is a devoted yet chilled out wife. And so is Mohit, a husband who never refrained Sia from living her life her way, atleast that is how it appeared to be.

Sia works as a banker with a MNC. Her hectic schedule would keep her occupied enough to block her thoughts from going astray.
Rhea, one of her colleagues at the office questioned her once," Sia, how can you live with such a casual attitude towards your personal life? " "What do you mean by that Rhea?" Sia was puzzled.
Rhea continued," I mean you never keep an eye on Mohit's whereabouts, who he speaks to, what he does when you are not around in town..Umm, you know what I am trying to say, if I were you, I would have never let my husband move so freely."
Sia gave a gentle smile and explained, "Rhea, you know something, if someone has to cheat, he/she can cheat anytime, no matter how much you keep an eye or play a watchdog. Fidelity doesn't come by control. If it has to come, it comes. I have seen many couples where husbands would dote on their wives,fulfill every wish,would never let an iota of doubt strike their wives mind, yet behind their back, the husbands would be living a secret life of love and betrayal. And that can be true for wives too.So it goes, What has to happen will happen. Emotion is a free bird,it flies where it wants to fly. "

Sure enough, Sia was not a typical wife,who would ask for her husband's time and attention.She knows what belongs to her will remain hers. Mohit never expressed his love to Sia in an overt way in these two years. Sia never complained either. There has always been an air of indifference around her.She never interfered in what Mohit did. More ever her job kept her on her toes all the time. She was frequent traveler on the business trips. Or is there something that she is hiding behind her cool demeanor. Perhaps, her own insecurity that she is not loved the way she wanted to.Her ambition with regards to her career may be soaring high, but her dreams about her love was crashing down with every passing day. But still she is quiet. Why? " Because, you cannot hold love in hand, you cannot put bars around it." She often tells to herself.
That thought had occurred to Sia many times. Why doesn't Mohit love her. Why he never does things that other men do for their women. She concludes, " Mohit is not the kind of guy who is expressive, he is pragmatic towards love too. He doesn't have the ability to decipher an abstract emotion, which needs to be felt without judgment. But , I trust him, even though he does not say I love you Sia, he will never break his marriage vows."

It was Monday morning. Mohit went for work, while Sia had taken a day off to finish some of the pending work at home. It was 5 in the evening. Sia decided to go on a shopping spree to Bandra which was at a considerable distance from the home. She shopped for some new curtains and bed linens. Sia was passing by the CCD, and decided to take a breather before heading back towards home.

She opens the door of the cafe. She is stunned. She finds Mohit with an unknown female accomplice. They were holding hands and smiling. She saw the kind of spark in Mohit's eyes which she rarely saw before .She felt the lump in her throat. Suddenly, Mohit lifted his head and just when his gaze intercepted Sia's look, she walked out of cafe. Mohit tried to call her cell phone, but she did not answer the call.
"Its over", Mohit received a text message.

Mohit hurried towards the home." Listen Sia, let me explain. I did not mean to betray you. I never ran away from our marriage vows. I was always by your side when you needed me.." Mohit begged .
Sia cut his explanation short, " Mohit, hold it there. You were never by my side when I needed you, because I never let you know when I needed you. And as far as betrayal goes, No you have not betrayed me,I have been betraying myself with the false belief. I am glad to know that atleast you love someone to an extent that you are willing to sacrifice our marriage vows.That was the kind of love I wanted to see in your eyes for me, but I did not know that it was never mine. I was wrong, that you cannot love anyone, that you do not have the ability to understand or express love. But, I am content to know that I was married to a man who can love and express just like everyone else. I wish you all the best."

Mohit cried, "Sia , wait! "

"Next time do not break your marriage vows " Sia left with the whip of air.

Ramazan Food Festival- Frazer Town Closing

This is the closing video of the Day 1 of Ramazan Festival. 

Frazer Town- Ramazan food festival Part 2

Ramzan Food Festival - Frazer Town Part 1

Hey There, This is my first time with the vlog, and purely the intention was experimental. I would call it an impromptu video. I created this video during my recent visit to Bangalore's Frazer town with my friends during the Ramzan food festival .  

A picture speaks a thousand words while a video speaks a million . Thanks to my friends for being a part of this fun activity.

                        Heart knows no reason what so ever, it just loves and loves forever.

Happiness comes from love and freedom to be yourself ,
Freedom is not devoid of emotions
Freedom is devoid of bondage
Freedom is not devoid of devotion
Freedom is when you know where you have to return.

It is going to be 1 year of our marriage. Although, it has been a long distance relationship, but still there is a string that holds us together. When I look back at the one year that is gone by, I still cannot believe how two different individuals, and by different, I mean ,completely contra-distinctive personalities. If one is Earth, the other is air, if one is day, the other is night, but still we are together. It goes beyond my understanding , why and how we met . But, what lies ahead is an unseen journey and it will unfold with every year.

So, there are a list of characteristics that I like in my husband, and some of them are getting imbedded in me too.

He is a very patient person (and patience is one thing which I never possessed from childhood. I can't wait for good things to happen, I almost always work on impulse, when it comes to day to day activities)

He is not dominating or forceful ,but he makes it clear what he wants in a subtle way.

He likes to include me in most of the things he does. He sees "us " instead of "me" .I remember, when I am sitting alone and or having food alone, he would call me and ask me to be with him. He doesnt like me to be alone.

He is protective and caring. If I am not around, he looks for me, where I went missing.

He helps me with the household chores. That is like a little kid helping mom with chopping the vegetables, doing the dishes, or removing the furniture while I am cleaning the floor.

He does certain things just for my sake, like coming over to meet me, when I am in town. Even if that requires a 1.5 hrs journey after office,he manages to make it even if it is late 11.30 in the night.

He has a keen sense of practical world. I almost fail to see the practical realities of the world, but he keeps me grounded. I am a dreamer and visionary. I do things with a future pay off model in front of me. This is one reason, why I never ignore what he advises me to do.

Many a times it has happened, that my overconfidence has failed , and his simple thinking has proved out to be right. So , I decided , I will drop my arms, when it comes to some practical decision making session.

If there is anything that I have learnt in my marriage- It would be patience. Sometimes it is boring , because by nature I am an impulsive person, but then I do not have a choice to be impatient. I like to fly in the air, just don't care about the tomorrow, live in the moment, pack my bags and go for a short trip. These adventures are still on my "Wishlist"

Oh, by the way I forgot, that he doesnt like gifting flowers and I love flowers of all sorts.........

Zindagi

Jab miloge mujhse, tumko main batlaungi

Tumko apne paas bitha kar, khoob sara batiyaungi

Puchungi tumse, kahan kho gaye the tum

Aisa kya hua, jo ho gaye tum mujhse gum

Tumhare sapne aankho me the sajaye

Tumne hi un sapno ki vajah the dikhaye

kahan gaye vo din ,jab the tum muskuraye

Ab to vo pal sirf yaadon me hain samaye

Tumse guft-agu karne ki tamanna hai jaagi

Kab miloge mujhse itna to bata do

Tumhe kahan dhundu - Ae zindagi

mujhe tum batla do.

Vo dono ek dusre me aise ghul jate the jaise paani me shakkar ke danane

Iftifaq to aisa hai, ke naam dono ka ek hai but seeyat ek dusre se alag

ek pyar ki paribhasha hai , to dusra vastavikta ki murat

ek uspe jaan lutata tha to dusre ko is baat ki ilam bhi nahi ke usme bhi jaan hai

vo uski ek hassi ki khatir kuch bhi kar sakta tha , dusra uski hassi ki vajah ko hassi me uda deta hai

Vo uski aankhon se aansu ko behne se pehle rok deta tha , dusra aankho me bhare aansu ko pehchaan bhi nahi paata

Usne behad mohabbat kar ke bhi saath chhod dia to dusre ne mohabbat na hone pe bhi sath nibhane ka vada kar liya.

Marriage

I got married on 23rd May 2014. If there is one thing that I would describe my wedding, it has to be-- chaotic and Sudden. Right from the day I met my husband to the day we got married.

And then in the retrospect, on 23rd May, it started early morning and the rituals were solemnized early next morning. 

Lo and behold! we were married, and the first expression that came to my mind after the wedding concluded -- 

"Is this all ? Am I married now ? Thank God, this has to happen only once in a life time."A transition from one family to another, believe it or not, I never felt even a single day of being a stranger or lonely in my new home and family. 

Everything seemed to be same, nothing changed. There was not an iota of that feeling of leaving my parents and having a new set of parents. The culture, the values have all been the same.

I will always consider myself blessed having the best in-laws in the world.

But all that said, I try to find the meaning of my marriage. I have a long distance relationship, which comes with its own set of challenges and advantages. A long distance does not work without trust and sense of belonging. At the end of the day each of the partners should know that that they belong to each other and their loyalty and fidelity should be towards each other. 

I have no insecurity in my marriage and the long distance relationship that I am a part of. One reason is that it helps me maintain my individuality and the other is I know that I am not alone. At the end of the day, if I am in some turmoil, I know who I have to turn to, and who will never leave my side.

That trust and faith keeps me going on. And while people find it strange that how can married couple live apart for so long, well , even I don't know, but I like the fact that I am not moving with the norms of the Indian society. The funny part is that whenever I meet my husband every month, it is like we are more as friends and we are in the process of getting to know each other, which in itself is fun and challenge at the same time. 

I and my husband are totally opposite beings on this planet. What got us together, I do not know. 

But still there is something that is so strong inside the heart and mind -- "He is my husband, I am his wife."And this is the only permanent relationship in the world.

They say marriages are made in heaven and God chooses the best one for you. I have got to believe in that.

Happy Birthday

I have reached an age where my maturity and wisdom should speak louder than the number
of years I have added to my life.

2014 Christmas celebrations at Our Lady of Good Health

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

From an agnostic to a believer - Because I have to believe in someone, then why not let it be God

I am a new believer in Lord Christ. But I have to say I am in love with Jesus, because his love is so unconditional. He doesn't want us to perform rituals, sacrifice, make offerings or do anything for him. All he wants us to do is to build a relationship with him, talk to him, share with him, trust him and believe in his words , the same investment that we make for any other relationship on Earth with another human being. He is non judgemental. He is a forgiver, as long as we accept our sins and faults. His love is unconditional, he doesn't ask us to change ourselves, he accepts the fact that we are not perfect, he doesn't say that you should not have temptations, he knows that it is human to be tempted but repentance is the only way out of sins. He doesn't even want us to convert to a Christian to have his mercy. He just wants us to come to him the way we are, with sickness, disease, tattered clothes, wounds...howsoever our current state is.
He loves us and accepts us the way we are. He is the faithful one.




What I learnt today -- Don't curse anyone but bless them even if you are in misery. Even if you have a wrong person in your life. Be grateful for it .Forgive people who have hurt you and you will invite God in your life. I tried doing the same today and I feel so much peace and experienced a miracle.




Today I went for the morning mass. The mass ended with the prayer -- May there be peace for our brothers and sisters in Israel, Egypt and Iraq. May there be opportunities for everyone who wants a better life. May there be happiness for everyone irrespective of their caste, colour, religion, language.
Is it not such a great gesture to pray for people who mean nothing to us, whom we don't even know personally. I love the simplicity of Christianity. The open hearted-ness, because the Lord himself said
"It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick."




Whenever I have had questions, I found answers in Bible. I know the sins I committed, but never knew why they are sins, until I read verses from Bible which answered my questions.




My favourite verse from the Bible :
 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11